3 things in my life……

November 8th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

ln my life, I discovered lots of things……. Especially the 3 things…… Ask yourself, if you ever are asked, think about it…. The three things in your life…….

3 THINGS

Three things of life once gone never comes back

Time, words & opportunity

Three things of life must not be lost

Peace, hope & honesty.

Three things of life are most valuable

Love, self-confidence & friends

Three things of life are never sure

Dreams, success & fortune

Three things make a Man/Woman

Hard work, sincerity & success

Three things of life that destroy a Man / Woman

Wine, pride & anger

When Sun RIse…….

November 8th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

SUN RISE

Every morning in Africa, when the Sun rises, a deer awakens, knowing it has to outrun the fastest Lion, or be hunted to death….

Every morning in Africa, when the Sun rises, A Lion awakens, knowing it has to outrun the slowest deer, or be starved to death…

It does not matter whether you are a deer or Lion, when the Sun rises,

Better be running at your best…

You only live once.

What do you really want to do and achieve in life?

Let’s think, learn & share.

It is a meaningful journey.

What do failure means to me……

November 8th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

I’m already 23 years old…. For the past 23 years, there are lots of things I really learnt…. Especially through one thing….. That is Failure!!!!! So today, I wrote what I think failure is to me….. If you happened to read this, I hope you think of it…. What did failure means to you…. Maybe if you think about it, you will see another side of failure….. So, failure is not something worst…. Is just bad…..

FAILURE

Failure doesn’t mean - You are a failure, it means - You have not succeeded.

Failure doesn’t mean - You accomplished nothing, It means - You have learned something.

Failure doesn’t mean - That you have been a fool, It means - You had a lot of faith.

Failure doesn’t mean - You’ve been disgraced, it means - You were willing to try.

Failure doesn’t mean - You don’t have it, it means - You have to do something in a different way.

Failure doesn’t mean - You are inferior, it means -You are not perfect.

Failure doesn’t mean - You’ve wasted your life, It means - You have a reason to start afresh.

Failure doesn’t mean - You should give up, It means - You must try harder.

Failure doesn’t mean -You’ll never make it. it means - It will take a little longer.

Failure doesn’t mean - God has abandoned you, It means - God has a better way for you

Ipoh…… My life as a Physiotherapy trainee……

October 25th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

          Today is the second day of Raya….. and also my 5th day of my holidays…… My holidays from 3 months practical stint in Ipoh General Hospital….. Seriously, for the past few days in Ipoh General Hospital….. lots of things i learnt throughout the life as a physiotherapy trainee…… seriously, i dislike the feeling as the newbie in the hospital….. others will be anticipating your clumsiness and also your immaturity…….and also you must be nice and also must always be prepare to accept comments from other people…..

              Ipoh General Hospital is the middle of the Ipoh Town….. it has the same setting as the Klang General Hospital….. especially the physiotherapy department…..especially the hydrotherapy pool….. exactly like the one in Klang General Hospital…….  And the one thing i really like bout this Ipoh Hospital is that it has an equal range of different ethnics people walk in and out of this hospital, whether to see our white robe’s angel or jus to visit their loved ones….. From Malay uncle to young Orang Asli wife…… Different people with different antic….. Not to mention some of the rich and snob people’s special ‘treatment’……….

P1020570_18

Ipoh General Hospital………                 

           Well, i’m always a KL girl….. no matter how much i dislike KL for its congested traffic or the busy and yet stressful lifestyle, i’m still the very KL girl…. And Ipoh is too peaceful for me….  in another word, too boring, i have no life there…. i dunno what to do…. especially after i finish my work in the hospital…… and especially i don’t have car to move my ass around….. besides walking around in the house, and walk a few steps to the stall to eat some Nyonya kuih and delicious tau fu fa with gula melaka…… seriously, Ipoh is definitely the best place for retirement….. i’m looking for a house for it…. kekekeke…. not for me…. for my daddy and mommy…..

P1020566 One of the streets in Ipoh…… Lee Ang once came here to film his latest film "Lust, Caution"……..

          Ok….. ok…. as a person who stayed in Ipoh for a quite a long time, i’ll introduce more on Ipoh…… Do you know Ipoh is also known as the Bougainvillea City…..???? I also didn’t know about it….. Especially till i walks around and see lots of bougainvillea around….. i asked my aunt, she said the City councill like to put it around the city…. i checked it online…. and yes…. Ipoh is the Bougainvillea City….. Smart??? Yes….. (^o^)

              More on Ipoh…… Ipoh is the capital of the state of Perak……. and is situated in the Kinta Valley, which once i learnt in Form 3 History, Kinta Valley is once the tin field, and also the largest one in the world….As you drive using the North-South Highway, u’ll passed by lots of limestone hills…. which is one of the main supply for the marbles…….. And as u moves around the housing estate, you will see various jungle-topped hills with white cliffs…..riddled with passages and caves, and as you will notices, they will be lots of the cave make into cave temples…..

Bougainvillea             As you move around with the car, you will make sure there is alot of this opulent shop houses…… which is old yet converted into main business centre….. Especially you see the one of the Malaysia’s best-preserved Chinatowns, the Old Town…… and Ipoh White Coffee is still the best…… yummy…… and once in a while, you will see the Indians has their ‘Little India’ especially during the Deepavali season….. Muruku….. Sari…..Latest Indian music….. is all around…… 

           Alright….. but one thing i’m very grateful with Royal College of Medicine Perak…… Because their library is open to us….. for people like me… who has nothing to do… they have free internet service….. yeah….. and medical books…… I think is kinda cool…. good time to waste……

Rcmp

Meaning of HEalth to Me!!!!!!

October 18th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

           

        As a physiotherapy trainee and a person who has knee injury due to sport, I always believe healing is not about seeing the best doctor or has the best medicine you can get. Healing is so subjective for me. When I was injured at the acute stage, I receive acupuncture treatment and he gave me an herbal wrap for 3 days. But, when I learn about soft tissue injury, heat is not a suitable treatment for acute injury. So, I asked my lecturer about Chinese herbal treatment, she said, that’s as well, because Chinese herbs induced heat into the injury and cause accumulation of fluids in the injured area, thus edema occurs. But, I was not satisfied with her answer as I, myself, who had injury and underwent herbs treatment, which worked for me. Yes, my knee healed but the knee is not stable and I have to stop my interest in Tae Kwan Do. My heart crashed and my life completely changed. Well, in my opinion the rate of healing of my the wound in my heart and spirit is much slower than the one in my knee. Therefore, eventhough my knee helaed but i still felt as though i am not heal yet. Why is this happening???? why am i feeling this way???

          So, in here i want ask you you… what do u think about health to you???? is it only when u have fever and took two panadols???? Or more than tat???? i personally think is more holistic ways of life…….. i really wish i can reverse the day injured my knee…

– Lots of luv, Shiau Lee (^o^)

Plato’s Eternity……. Love in the Aegean Sea……

October 16th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

Long time ago, I watched a Korean and Taiwan drama called Love of Aegean Sea…… it is always in my mind because I always like Alec Su and Chae Rim, both of them portray a beautiful character and bring it out from their “Xin” (Heart)………..

Love01_2

Love on the Aegean Sea begins with a girl named Xiao Tong (Chae Rim) who is going to Greece for vacation. Instead of going with her cousin, Xiao Tong ends up going with a drunken stranger named Li Yao Xiang (Peter Ho). And when they arrive in Greece, they accidentally split up. Yao Xiang then meets a girl named Yi Qian who helps him to get to his hotel. And Xiao Tong accidentally meets a young man named Lu En Qi (Alec Su) and he gives her a present before he left, which is a bracelet called Plato’s Eternity.

Today I want to share with you all my insight on Alec Su as Lu En Qi and the rest of the story of this Love in Aegean Sea……

The Story……..

The very accomplished and multi-talented Lu En Qi, exactly like a prince charming, actually he is the one that is lock up in his ivory tower, every step of his education is carefully planned and mapped out for him, schooled. All the way till there wasn’t any more to go.

Nothing is left for him to choose, including choosing a suitable bride for him. A prince can only marry a princess. He is made to feel a moral obligation to DUTY,

Duty as a son,
Duty to take his place in society.
His position as the rich and powerful

With his impeccable upbringing, his resentment was suppressed. The unspoken resentment simmering deeply in his heart, waiting to release from his heart…….

He learnt to wear a suitable social "mask" or right social occasion.  His circle of friends carefully screened. His instincts finely trained and honed. He was taught not to trust or take people at their words but use his own judgment. He was taught how deal with people and to weigh the situation from a broader perspective. In other words, he was groomed for "greater things".

He learnt that everything was "meant for his good".  The high hopes and expectancy of his mother cannot be undermined in any way. She devoted her life preparing him for this. He cannot fail to disappoint her. It is his duty to live up to her expectations and has yet to fail her.

Above all, he understood his mother.

A fabulous socialite, his mother is just as accomplished, in society or the boardroom. She sees herself as a "mover of things", daring, scheming and yet manipulative, well in control, Elegant and refined, she groomed him in her own mould.

His father tells how beautiful he was as a child, so bright, intelligent and e was simply perfect……. In due to time, he became "her everything"………."her pride and joy".

En Qi once "gave her a lesson in life” it is with pride and realization that her son has indeed grown up to be the person she envisioned and had so painstakingly groomed.

En Qi learnt to accept his lot in life ~ living in a gilded cage.
He longed for freedom.
He no longer smiles……….
He never smiles………….
He wears a mask all the time……………courteous, always charming, distant, cool……….
The only physical sign of rebellion was…………one button………
He opened one shirt button more than permitted.

The one person who could read him was his beloved Xiao Tong, she could understand him so well……So well he could never lie to her. It was with the greatest effort on his part to play out the role he needed to do to convince her to forget him. Even that was so hard he could not look her in the eye .nor linger too long in her presence without loosing his lines or composure. He could only seek to attack her so vilely to make her cry to totally dishonor her to be an utter cad…

In the beginning

The first meeting taking an instant photo at the Island of Aegean Sea. The photographer gives them the photo. They admired it and Xiao Tong just tells him to "keep it with him". That look on his face surprised secretly pleased then a little hesitant to take it unused to such generosity……In his heart…….he had received more than just a photo…..

He asked only to be with the one he loves………..
You see him smelling her hair
You see them making music together being together

After that fateful day his whole world seems to have collapsed
Very heart wrenching
To see how En Qi is bearing up, standing by the narrow corridors, En Qi….. his body shaking, sobbing uncontrollably, cries silently and not daring to let him to fight for love and freedom…..

Like a bird that was shot down, his wings clipped……he lies mortally wounded……..and bleeding. He drags himself to his bedroom and falls on his knees beside the bed and lies there….

Longing for the comfort of her loving arms……..Longing to hold her……and never ever letting go………. Knowing………….it’s the end….and he will never see her or hold her again… A part of him just died………just like his piano……………….he locked up his heart………….and closed that chapter of his life.

He became a man without a heart……Cold Expression…… Devoid of feelings
Channeling all his energies to only work…….He worked himself into frenzy……Its also entirely plausible, that proceeding with the wedding will see a "perfect bridegroom in En Qi" together with her so-called perfect princess….. Yi Qian…….

Everyone was happy again in their "perfect world"……… especially his mother…. Despite seeing her son is suffering deeply………

You realize just how cold the world became……..when En Qi stopped being happy………………..

BUT FATE was not done with this pair of lovers….They were destined to meet again………

His heart stopped………….when he realized it was her…."It can’t be!" with shock…………He watched her walking toward him………Totally unaware of his presence…..The ghost of the En Qi of 3 years ago awakens…….. His eyes following her every move….His eyes lighting up………..drinking in the sight of her…….

The chains that bound all his feelings all this time….. slackens as he allowed the music to carry him…………brings out all the suppressed feeling of the past 3 years…He marveled at how she handled herself…………She’s beautiful as he had remembered……….and there was a new found poise and confidence………….

Her fluster at the first sight of him…………

Like the beacon………..the twinkling notes of their song……. guided their hearts once again….. With the memories of their love…….

En Qi fought back his tears…He was not free to choose……just like before with his "princess" beside him…..He had to wear a mask………. Plunged into another mire of unhappiness…….He could not feel his freedom…………

He had not been able to forget her all this time………..Hapless……….He watched as if she walked thru his soul……..and out of his life again………

This time, he was determined to not ever see her again because it would have been too cruel to her and him….he would hurt her again………He could not bear that………He’d rather suffer alone …………and in silence than to do that…….

It was heartwarming to see a second chance at happiness………..

To see this "Superman" in that awful green apron making dinner just because could not bear to let her to use her hands to prepare dinner……. To see the same person drawing "hearts" all over the place especially on the palm of his beloved……The one who plays the piano so beautifully once again the one who speaks thru music…….The same corporate giant who takes to the streets sincerely asking for signatures from total strangers to create…  Ten-Thousand blessing” for her. Trying desperately to heal her…….. After his mother’s monstrous attempt on her, leaving her a shell of her former life, robbed of her gifts and spirit……..

You remembered once upon a time, this beautiful smile on his face as he watched her sleep. One morning on the "Isle of Freedom" Santorini only to have it disappear as he realize sadly "it can never be with her"………
They have come…….. So far…………………. Passed life and death…………… Everyone pays a price……….for something……….in the end…….

En Qi’s paid …………… Xiao Tong paid……..and his mother paid ………..for the rest of their lives………….

All because they love the beautiful En Qi…………..

There is also connection is always there between the two rival lovers…… One who loves truly and the one who gives his all for the one he loves……….

The message of Plato’s Eternity is runs thru both of them…………..

When En Qi left his "heart" bracelet for her…….The song Plato’ eternity was sweepingly beautiful………

"In my dreams………I see you…… I discover……..I am in the oceans…….. I reach out to you……. I find myself sinking to the bottom…….. 3000 miles…………….stand between us……… I will……. exchange for being with you……………… lie in deep slumber in the deepest part of the oceans"

The music for the time when En Qi tell her……………Yao Xiang will see the sunrise in the morning. Is the same piece they used when En Qi tells her to let Yao Xiang take care of her in his place. It made it even more touching

Alec Su put in a lot of thoughts and feelings into this character of Lu En Qi as Alec uses his "Xin"(heart) to reach out to you as En Qi……

You have to use your "Xin"(heart) to listen……..

This role so well portrayed, incredibly sensitive and really a fantastic performance.

Alec has to use lots of expression to bring out the character as most of it is unable to verbalize

At times Lu En Qi can come off as a weak but certain times, he portrayed an insufferable attitude. As though there is nothing is as it seems on the surface

Lu En Qi character is very hard to portray because he does not have a lot of lines..
But his character is the most complex character there

This one requires "Nei Xin Si" (acting from within)…..

It requires a lot of body language and eyes that speaks……..

The real reason why I enjoyed it so much was because I am able to read this character.

Alec’s portrayal is complete and has depth. The job of the actor is to let the audience SEE the character…. He did an excellent job.

As someone commented "hey……Alec Su is surprisingly good in this one"
I need to say that this is a good role for an actor and Alec really fleshed this one out properly.

You must "think a little deeper" when you watch this drama it’s not a "no-brainer" romance drama like other Idol dramas!!!!!!

The plot and story flows really naturally and unfolds dramatically though sometimes it meanders

Alec lives and breathes Lu En Qi

So you see…………………… just how meticulous ……..is Alec in this performance……….

Love01_1

Korean Drama and the impacts on me…..

October 12th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

– Korean drama sometimes really make me go back to my past…. Make me feel that i’m small and useless cause i can’t even let go my memories that has been with me since i dunno when… Is rather sad to know that i’m still clinching to this memories till i don;t want to give chance to my heart to open back again…..

               Korean drama reminds me of my past, my life and my memory…. A memory that i dun think i wanna forget for the rest of my life….. But the memory which will destroy my life if i dun let it go at all… But this is also another memory that will let me breath, let my heart keeps pumping, let my soul wondering around and let my spirit keeps flying around….

Top_1
              I’m my memory and My memory is really me…. I have been leaving with this memory and it never leaves me….. So, sometimes, i wonder, will i live without this memory???? Will i be able to breath without this memory???? Is kinda funny someone actually leave in this kind of world thinking like that….. i also wish i can bring myself out of this memory……..

           Recently, i watched a korean drama called Full House, acted by Song Hye Go and Bi…. Both are pretty people….. And the character acted by Bi, definitely gives me an impact of life cause it reminds me of a person…. a person who long ago i knew and till now, i can’t forget…. i always thought drama is drama, there is definitely no life and no true in it…… and all is also very dramatic…… Therefore, life is life…. is very present…. No drama in it….

          Ask yourself today, do you ever have a unforgetable memory???? If one day, you lost it, what will happen to you???? Will you be able to live without this memory????? As for me, i found it….. I have and i know i can’t live without this memory…. This drama maybe drama for most people…. but it has make an impact in my life……

           I, me and my memory……

Lots of luv,
Shiau Lee (^o^)

Why Medical Students Should Have Their Own Blogs

October 12th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith
I found this article written in one of the medical website… which i think is rather interesting because it can helps to relay why i want to blog because it is very therapeutic for me…. and this particualr doctor actually thinks it helps people when they write…. although how much i hate the person, as long as i release it, i believe things will get better with life…. especially on my life…..
Hope u guys enjoy this article…. take care…..
Why Medical Students Should Have Their Own Blogs
Posted 10/06/2006

Nicholas Genes, MD, PhD

All across the country this fall, thousands of students are starting medical school or new clerkships. Some are kids fresh out of college, while others are embarking on a second career they’ve always dreamed about. Still, this diverse group shares some common features:

  • They’re going to be isolated from the life they knew before; maybe they’ve moved to a new city, or maybe they won’t get to call or see family and loved ones as often as they used to.
  • They are going to experience some powerful things, such as cutting into flesh, delivering a baby, breaking devastating news, or staying awake for ungodly periods of time.

In short, this is a group that should be communicating a lot with others — stories, perceptions, rants — at precisely the time when such communication is most difficult.

The solution? I think they all ought to get a blog.

You know — a Web-log, an online diary. Now, I’m not talking about those vapid MySpace pages full of classroom gossip and party pictures (although medical school provides its share of that, too). But I think the students who sit down for 20 minutes every now and then to record their impressions of the wondrous, challenging experiences they’re grappling with will be doing themselves a favor. Frustrated friends and family who haven’t heard from their beleaguered med school castaway will take a measure of relief in seeing an updated blog entry, even if it’s a gripe about exams written at 3 AM.

But perhaps even more important is that medical student blogs are useful for students themselves. It’s therapeutic to record your feelings, to vent frustrations, and to register difficult experiences. This is the kind of activity that makes for a sensitive and caring doctor — probably the kind of doctor that most beginning students expect to be but forget about somewhere along the line. Blogging can help students remember. It’s also instructive because it allows us to chart our progress through the years. On those bleak days of surgery clerkship, it may be encouraging to look back and see how far you’ve come since the first squeamish posts about anatomy lab.

Finally, blogging can create opportunities and open up frontiers. Beyond the simple scenarios that have helped me — such as getting the inside scoop on hospitals during residency interview season — getting involved with the nascent medical blogosphere can help you sift through the Web’s educational resources (such as a collection of clinical cases and archived school lectures). It also can inspire student activism or show you what life is like in foreign med schools. Blogging might even open up doors into research.

To put it in med-school parlance, such an activity is "high-yield" and quite possibly "evidence-based,"[1,2] and thus worthy of a medical student’s valuable time. Plus, you can’t beat the price (blogs are free and easy to set up at sites such as www.blogger.com and www.wordpress.com).

Medical students can take their cues from some of the blogs already out there. Besides Medscape’s own cadre of bloggers at The Differential, there are institutional blogs such as the University of Michigan’s med school blog and StudentDoctor.net, where some editorial freedom is sacrificed for a potentially larger audience. Some students write mostly for family and friends, while others give updates on much more than medicine.

If there’s one unique concern that weighs heavily on medical students, it’s privacy — for their patients, for their colleagues, and for themselves. This may explain in part why med student blogs are less common than, say, graduate or law student blogs. While students in other disciplines are expected to develop public communication skills, future doctors are instructed to keep it in the chart or at the bedside.

But there are plenty of medical bloggers who are HIPAA-compliant. They simply obscure details of patient encounters and keep their own names and affiliations offline (which is relatively easy to do, although there’s no guarantee that a blogger still won’t be discovered). Other bloggers maintain anonymity, not necessarily for their patients but to protect themselves (the blogger behind Ah Yes, Medical School wouldn’t be nearly as funny if his classmates and teachers knew who he was).

Of course, getting your feet wet in medical blogging may seem a little overwhelming. Fortunately, there’s Grand Rounds — which in the hospital means stale bagels and esteemed, boring lecturers, but on the Web means a weekly collection of the best in medical blogging. Each week, a different blogger "hosts" Grand Rounds and displays links to other bloggers’ best posts of the week. I have been fortunate to interview many of these bloggers for Medscape’s Pre-Rounds series, and I can say that many initially had a skepticism of this new form of communication until the benefits won them over.

Andy Warhol said that, in the future, everyone will be famous for 15 minutes. While that’s not yet proven, it’s safe to say that most people will one day have some sort of online presence. I urge medical students to set up that territory now — for themselves, their careers, their loved ones — as they undergo some of their most transformative years.

References

  1. DasGupta S, Charon R. Personal illness narratives: using reflective writing to teach empathy. Acad Med. 2004;79:351-356. Abstract
  2. Hatem D, Ferrara E. Becoming a doctor: fostering humane caregivers through creative writing. Patient Educ Couns. 2001;45:13-22. Abstract

Nicholas Genes, MD, PhD, second-year resident in emergency medicine, Mount Sinai Hospital, New York, NY

Disclosure: Nicholas Genes, MD, PhD, has disclosed no relevant financial relationships.

Medscape Med Students.  2006;8(2) ©2006 Medscape

Hi guys, is me Shiau Lee…. i’m back in blogging……

September 5th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

Hello bloggers,

                     Is been so long since i written in my blog… and today, since i got extra time and also the mood to write something….. i might as well, send regards to all my frenz…. i miss u guys so much…….

                   If anyone of you, dunno what did i do recently, u came to the right blog, currently, i’m doing my clinical placement in Ipoh Hospital….. for 3 months…. today is my 8 working days…. and seriously if u ask me how am i doing there????? well, to tell u the truth, i’m still very blur….. i dunno how to say but i’m still adapting to the well-to-do setting in government hospital…. i was told to do jus my work…. which i still blur where is my scope of work as a student????? at least i have seen some MOs are doing well with their jobs, at least they know what to do???? but, for me, i’m practically still blur with the surrounding….

           Besides that, i’m feeling rather tired and restless, what is it??? Signs and symptoms of Panic Disorder????? actually, not really of that, is just that i dun feel the "DRIVE" to move on with the clinical here because i dun see myself improving??? i know the anatomy and physiology but definitely, i dunno how to use it??? Why WHy???

           So, is this what they call High IQ but low EQ…. look like, i’m in that kinda category….. i really miss my past clinical in HUKM, because everyday, i wanna learn new things there… and also, maybe because i partner is Crime…. MAzlina mohd… who was there with me, we always fight over things from anatomy to pysiotherapy management…. but, here, i dun hav many closee friends who can share my views regarding my presentation in this time clinical, what is worst is this clinical is rather tough because the subjects are difficult, from NEurology -field on brain, Women health, Paediatric- field for children, and geriatric - Field for elderly people……  these are the subjects who is kinda difficult cause is a new topic for all of us….

          however, is only the beginning, i really hope things will change… maybe, is things don’t change, i’ll resort to my mind changing again and again…..

       Blogging is definitely good for me, cause i wanna let people know that i dun like them… for example, i’m happy this time cause there is no more f***ing b***h in my sight anymore which relieve the tension in my neurons……

           Happy clinical to all my friends, and for those, long time no see…. jus leave a msg, k??? Ciao!!!!!

                    SHiau Lee is not having great time in IPOH…. Life is not that Coool anymore…. BORING,,,,

When you thought………

June 9th, 2006 by shiauleedainnocentwith

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one.
When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind to animals.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you make my favorite cake for me and I learned that the little things can be the special things in life.
When you thought I wasn’t looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew there is a God I could always talk to and I learned to trust in God.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you make a meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I learned that we all have to help take care of each other.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you give of your time and money to help people who had nothing and I learned that those who have something should give to those who don’t.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I felt you kiss me good night and I felt loved and safe.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you take care of our house and everyone in it and I learned we have to take care of what we are given.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn’t feel good and I learned that I would have to be responsible when I grow up.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw tears come from your eyes and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it’s all right to cry.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw that you cared and I wanted to be everything that I could be.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I learned most of life’s lessons that I need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up.
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I looked at you and wanted to say, "Thanks for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn’t looking."

I really like what is going on with my life…… is like a roller coaster to me…. but, at the same time i really hate it because in some time, some part, some chapter of my life, i have to endure emotional and mental roller coaster which is making me really feeling down…..#

There is sometimes, i really feel like i have no friends, nobody like me, no pretty face, no sexy body and no life….. and this kind of feeling is pullling me really down to earth till i can’t breath…..thus, writing this blog at this point of my life really bring me to the surface, gasp some feel fresh air with a positive mind that life can starts again with a new chapter…. thus, i’m trying to leave this chapter and starting a new chapter again in my life with the hope this chapter is not killing me but is making me stronger to move on with life………

Hope you all like the words above…. do leave some message in my life chapter,…. happy to hear from you…….